April 2016
April is the month of going to visit the loved ones in the graveyards. Well, this year we didn't get to go visit because my uncle from Kajang, Dad's younger brother (Xi Jie, means fourth uncle) suffered from kidney failure. He was getting thinner and thinner every year we went back for Chinese New Year. This year i brought back my DSLR camera to take memorable pics, but I didn't get to take his pic together with his siblings :(
Around March, my dad came to pick me up from Subang after my class in college, he said that we are going to visit my uncle at the nursing home around PJ. When we were there, my dad talked to my uncle then hugged him tight a few times and told him to be strong. I almost teared up as I can clearly see how much my dad loves his sibling. Then after a few weeks, my uncle was admitted to the ICU ward in Gleneagles Hospital in Kuala Lumpur. Everyone was worried and fear what will happen to him. It turns out that he needs a surgery A.S.A.P. because blood is coming out from his anal which is not from his intestines or stomach, it was from his head. Last few weeks before he was admitted, he fell down in the toilet. He did went to see the doctor but did not say that he knocked his head. The doctor also did not do any MRI scan on him to see which part he was injured. By the time we realised, the blood was already clogged at the back of his head. That is what causing him to have constant headaches and can't remember what he was talking about. Due to the expenses that are too expensive to pay in Gleneagles Hospital KL, they decided to shift my uncle to a cheaper place, which is the Hospital Kuala Lumpur. He was still in the ICU ward.
April comes, and the first week after my class as usual, I will go back hometown by KTM. While on the way back, my eldest sister called me and said uncle has passed away just like that because he can't hold on the suffering any longer :'( I silently cried in the train until I reached back home and my dad came and picked me up. Parents say they will be going to the funeral the next morning, so they need me to take care of my Grandparents and sending younger sister to tuition. That means I can't go to the funeral to pay my respects to my uncle.
Uncle, you've suffered long. 7 years ago you asked my sister to write the will letter for you for your sons. You already knew that you will be going off soon. My aunty (dad's sister) said that you only can live for another 5 years starting from 2009, but you hv live for another 2 years to see your son graduate and go college in Taiwan. Now Chinese New Year we won't be able to see you anymore, but we know that you will always be in our hearts ;) Rest well now dear uncle
7/8/2016 (Sunday)
I forever rmb this day as 6/8/2016 was the launch of Pokemon Go, and I was out hunting Pokemons instead of taking care of my precious family member suffering at home.
Bobby, age 14 (98) passed away due to old age. Well it is also because Monday I have part-time at Sunway Lagoon, that's why I need to return back to Subang to prepare for my work. On Sunday night, when I'm preparing to go Setia Walk for another Pokemon hunting trip, my boyfriend asked me if I knew about Bobby, because while he was in his room, I was charging my phone inside then a watsapp msg came from my younger sister saying Bobby was buried that morning at the top of the hill near my house.
Before I went back to Subang, I did came back to see my precious boy, he was laying on the floor, can't even stand up to go eat his food. His legs joints are already swollen and his skin which is on the floor started to wounds and maggots started to grow. I asked my dad if the vet is coming to treat him, my dad called the vet for a few days, either that day he is not in town, or he doesn't even pick up the phone at all. We made one appointment with him one day, and was waiting for him to come, but in the end, my dad called him and he said he forgotten about the appointment and he was already in Gombak. Screw him and I never want that vet to treat my pets anymore. So me and my dad took care of him by spraying those anti-maggots antiseptic. The wounds started to get better and stopped bleeding. I was so sure that he still can eat and be better after a few days. Damn I was so wrong...After I left, my dad said he can't eat anymore as he was in pain on the throat, so to end his suffering he decided to call that vet again to give him a shot to stop his heart beat. Within 5 seconds injecting the shot, he's gone like that. :'(
Thank you my boy for protecting the family for a decade from dangerous animals (esp snakes, monitor lizards) and also thieves. I am sorry that I did not spend much time with you as I need to be in the shop or out studying. But I always love you and you will always be my precious boy
11/12/2016 (Sunday)
I woke up to a phone call by my 2nd sister saying that my beloved grandmother has passed away... I was so shocked that I even "HUH" at my sister. She started crying and that made me wonder, am I still sleeping/dreaming? I stared at the ceiling for a few minutes and got up to sit at my rooms charger port. I started crying because it was so sudden. My younger sister came to my room asking me to prepare because we are going to visit her at her place.
When i reached her place, I saw my grandpa sitting on his usual chair and I went to him to hold his hand. He kept on repeating to me :"婆婆走了，什么都没有讲，离我一个人..." (Grandma is gone, didn't even said a thing, leaving me all alone). I broke down into tears while holding his hand, everyone there also broke down into tears. Then I told him that I will go inside the room to see her before they put her into the coffin. She was dressed in a beautiful gold chinese dress and it was as if she was just sleeping normally. The funeral went on for 3 days and we did some prayers at night from 7pm till around 1030pm/11pm.
The most heart broken one among the grandchildren is my second sister who is getting married next year 7/1/2017. It is a taboo if she and the husband-to-be come and visit her. But then my sister still come and visit her one last time for a few minutes then she have to leave the place already. Relatives and friends came by to pray and pay their respects. Some broke down to tears even louder than us, scolding my grandma why she have to leave like that. My grandma's younger sister (Yi Po) from Tanjong Malim also came to visit her. My aunty (mom's eldest sister) said that last time she got a phone call from grandma, asking her to come back to visit her. Because my aunty's husbands mom passed away a month ago, so they can't go to people's house to visit in the mean time. But all now she is feeling is regret. She didn't get to visit her mother for one last time. :(
The 2nd day morning, my grandpa decided to play his harmonica to her. Its been more than 10 years that grandpa didn't touch that instrument. Now he played it with all his heart for her :'). 3rd day, its time to close the coffin by nailing it down and prepare to bring to Kepong for cremation. We walked around the town with the coffin in the car, then sat on the bus to go to the destination. When we reached, we did some prayers again before the coffin was sent to the cremation machine. But before sending it in, the Shifu asked us to go down and eat some snacks. I thought that we will be the one sending her off. We reached the canteen at the down hill and got our food, suddenly typhoon came and swoop off the things from the tables. It suddenly rained so heavy that everyone stop eating and find a shelter to hide from the massive wind. Her ashes will be picked up on Wednesday (14/12/16) morning and place on the compartment with all her belongings.
2 years back then, she suffered from unable to breathe, she was admitted to the hospital and we thought she won't make it. My aunty (Chin Lee Hong) even said that my grandma decided to divide who will be getting her necklace, her earrings her bangles, her rings, etc. But then after that day, she was nursed back to health. She was as good as ever. Her smile makes me smile, her laugh while watching a tv show on a guy being chased by a dog makes me laugh too. 8D
I was devastated that I never get to keep my promise in treating her a meal when I got my first salary from my first job :'( All the good memories with her, from helping her move shop to helping in taking care of her, buying food for her, making her comfortable before I leave back home makes me feel like thanking god I did something for her before she was gone. And also thank god I bought the DSLR camera for the reunion dinner in 2015 that I got to take some memorable pictures :') Grandma, when you heard about me working in Sunway Lagoon as a scream actor, you thought that I am working my way to become an actress and kept on asking me not to give up. Well even though that is not my real job, I just listen to your words which encourage me not to give up in life. You supported me in every ways even though you don't really understand about it. Thank you so much...
I love you grandma... Lets meet on the other side when it is my time to go :') I am sorry that I'm unable to spend more time with you and come visit you whenever I return from Puchong. I will cherish the memories I have with you and will also cherish the things you gave and said to me. Love you always grandma
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